Carry On

Hey everyone,

I’m not even sure how to begin this post; if any of you follow me on Twitter you’ll already be aware that these past few weeks have been a bit turbulent for me.  I did do a lot of writing about it, which ranged from cursing and complaining, to emotional sobbing and crying, it’s all in my drafts. But the last thing I want to do is drag you down as well, because it’s what would be the point. It’s Easter you should be having fun, going to church (if that is what you do) or pigging out on Easter eggs. So no matter what I’m feeling, I want to hear about good Easters and what everyone is getting up to. One day I may share that part of my world, but at the moment I’m just not ready for that. But what I will promise you is I that will be strong and carry on. I will try not to let pressures get me down or think less of myself. I’m just so confused right now; I don’t want to hurt anyone. But God is with me and I have count my blessing not my problems, right? :'(

I’m sorry this is such a depressing post I really don’t mean it to be, I’ll be back to my normal self soon, this is just a season and it will past.

Take care everyone x

What Was That About?

Hey Guys,

How you all been? The past few days have been so busy for me *sigh*, what happened to the days staying in bed and staying in your PJs all day. I had some plans with family and friends but the weather has been a such a wash out lately, no ones in the mood.

So I focused on errands that I’ve been putting off and general work that I should do. I tried to squeeze as much as I could in a day, which seemed to be working. Sometimes the unexpected happens and things get delayed (not forgotten but delayed), no big deal right? – WRONG! One of my friends had such a go at me, they said the meanness things, didn’t listen to anything I had to say. They made me cry (T_T). I’m not really a cry-cry person (unless a ball has smacks me in the face), but this particular 'friend' is quickly becoming a master of upsetting me. So on Sunday I went over to their place make it better, but somehow it got worst. Then I did something that I never done before, I just got so upset I left in this diva-style (US Soap opera) dramatics. I stormed out the flat with my cheesy ‘one liner’, the lift doors closing behind me as he followed. I thought I could make it to the car before they’d get downstairs. But there they were already at my car! *damn it, some proper Edward Cullan business going on*. Still no sign of an apology from them, but more of the abuse I was getting before. So I give a cold look, got in my car and disappeared into the distance, leaving them standing there. At the time it felt like the right thing to do, because I just couldn’t stay in that situation any longer *plus I have to admit it did feel pretty cool :)*. Now I just can’t stop thinking about it, I’m so distracted and sad *a little angry too*. I just can’t make sense of it all, how something so small can be taken so greatly out of proportion. But I’m going pause on the apologizing for a while, I mean what is the point if it completely one sided?

I’m sorry guys this post is really depressing, I’m sorry if I’ve brought anyone down. It’s just were my head is a t the moment – quite annoying cause its so not me. I promise this won’t last…well fingers crossed anyway.

Take care